Sunday, February 28, 2010

DREAMS...

1 am in the morning.


Strange how things start to clear up once you make up your mind.
Things are unfolding..slowly..but clearly, giving me a deeper glimpse of the kind of person I really am.


When I was young, I wanted to be a teacher and when I grew older, I started to love dance. But never did I dream of taking it up professionally. Hell, I didn't even know it's scope until two years ago! But now I know and I realise that I am just not the kind of person who can be happy doing something mechanical. I can NEVER imagine myself in a completely formal atmosphere where people have to be very careful about what they are saying. That just ain't my style. It feels nice to know that the path I have chosen is one which is based solely on expression. Dance is the expression of one's innermost feelings, feelings which might have been left unexpressed had I taken another path in life.





I realise that this period in my life will be the one which will determine much of my future and I'm rather excited to be honest.


At the end of the day, all of us are little children, following our dreams or atleast trying to follow them and making the best of them in a world where everyone is too busy growing up. I, for one, am quite happy saying that I'm about to take up dance because I simply love it and enjoy it. I sincerely hope that the child within me doesn't die in a quest to be the best. If I ever do forget, I hope you (my bloggy friends) will remind me why I started this journey in the first place.


The story of my life is about to reach a crucial stage and I'm glad I'm the author of this story:-)

Friday, February 26, 2010

Touched by an Angel called A

Yes, this is about you. I know you will read this sooner or later and this is the only way I can say what I feel.
I know you are hurting and believe me when I say, I'm hurting too. But this was the only way to go. I can't even call you my love anymore. You aren't mine anymore to say that.

Know this and keep it in your heart. The way I have loved you I can love no one else. The way YOU have loved me, no one ever will. You have made me whole in a way you will never know.I hope I have made you whole too. You healed this heart of mine and filled it with so much love that I still believe in it. I still believe and I will continue believing. That's the gift you have given me. For life.

You came into my life and changed everything. You were my angel. My love who helped me to become the Deboshree I am today. You were the warmth I needed, you gave me the love my heart desired and gave me more than I ever expected. Yes A, I will NEVER forget you. I will never forget what you have given me. I hope I have loved you enough. I hope you will not lose faith. I hope that you remember what I told you and believe in it, for I meant every word.

We met for a reason and eventhough my heart is bleeding right now, I know that our time together has come to an end. Yes, I am crying. I know you are too but I wish you ALL the happiness life can offer. Touch the sky and be what you have always wanted to be. Do it for me. That's the last thing I ask of you.

I wonder if I'll be able to love again but it doesn't matter anymore. A, you made me believe in myself. You gave me the will to try again and do things in life. I will never forget that. PLEASE don't forget what I have given you. Remember that you are a WONDERFUL man and nothing can change that. Thank you A. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. You will get the best in life. Nothing can change that.

I will always love you. But please move on A. That's what I am trying too. Be happy please.

You were my angel. You touched my heart and I'll never be the same again.

Farewell A.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

And I'm back...

Hello people!!

Did anyone miss me? (Doesn't seem so :P)
Well, I certainly missed blogging and all my bloggy friends!
I had gone to Bombay for a week to meet my man. Going to Bombay has cleared up my mind in a way I never imagined. Things became clearer and finally fell into perspective. Life is sooo unpredictable. One moment we are sooo unsure and the next moment, everything is there for you to see!!
Such is life. 
Everytime I meet my partner, it's as if we have to start from scratch. It's long distance and rather trying at times. It's a challenge for us with every passing day but all I can say is that we'll fight. Fight 'coz we love each other too much. It would be easy to give up but ten times harder to live without each other. Wish us the best for the future!
On the other hand, I have finally made a decision. I'm going to be a professional dancer. I may get injured and there is a huge risk in this field, but this is the only field with my heart in it. On top of that, I can always resume my studies later on but every year is precious for me if I choose dance now. I know it's bloody hard, but what the hell? If I love it, I doubt it will seem so hard.
It's taken me a long time to realise what I finally want. But now that I know what it is, I feel sooo relieved!

Lots of love
Deboshree

Friday, February 12, 2010

P.S. I love you

Now this is coming straight from the heart.
I just watched P.S.- I love you and guess what, it's beautiful!
Not because it has some fairytale ending but because it is just so true! Life ain't easy, but then nothing worth the effort ever is.
We all live and love and it is foolish to say that we won't love again after we lose a loved one. Our heart is too big and we are nothing but a fish out of a pond without love to feed upon.
I'm not doing a very good job of expressing myself here but it's just that I am so moved. Right now, I don't care about my words being beautiful or anything. All I want to do is share what I am feeling. Not everything has to be beautifully expressed. Sometimes it's just beautiful to feel.

One thing is for sure, it is not about being faithful to a memory, but being faithful to the person when he is alive and living next to you.
Just to make the one you love feel special, just so he KNOWS, go ahead this minute and tell that person how much you love him/her! That's sure as hell where I am heading!

P.S.- I love you

P.P.S- Irish men are damn sexy!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

FORBIDDEN DREAMS..


Forbidden though you are,
it doesn't stop me from thinking about you.
Forbidden though you are,
it doesn't stop me from dreaming about you.
Forbidden though you are,
my heart still yearns for you.
Forbidden though you are,
My body cries out for you.
Though I have never seen you,
I know I have known you.
In a way words can't explain,
In a way only the heart understands.
And because you are forbidden,
You are infinitely more sweet than everything attainable.
I know you are not within my reach,
But that doesn't mean I have stopped wanting you.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

CHANGING...


A slight change,
Barely even noticable,
Barely even understandable,
But a change nevertheless,
Her heart is soaring,
Her spirit is rising,
Her passion is burning,
The walls are cracking,
But why is she fighting so hard?
Why is she holding onto something that has to go?
Because this transitory road is not without its obstacles,
The unknown is what scares the soul,
But she can hide no longer,
For the time to wake up has come,
Now before her eyes the walls have smashed,
The passion within has soared uncontrollably,
Consuming her with an intensity too powerful to fight,
Now all she can do is give in,
And become the passion HERSELF,
For she is no longer a child,
BUT A WOMAN FROM WITHIN.