Thursday, December 31, 2009

I'm thankful

Life has changed a lot in the past year and all I can say is that I have grown. I'm thankful to be so alive and have so much love surrounding me. Honestly speaking, I really couldn't ask for more.

My dear bloggy friends, I have learnt so much from you and I'm really thankful to have met all of you. All of you have inspired me in one way or another. It is through blogging that I have realised that we all are essentially one. No matter which country we come from or which religion we follow, all of us are essentially the same. All of us come to this world to share our thoughts and that is what creates a strong bond between us.

Emmi, Ron, John, Nancy, Jenean, Kelly...I'm thankful to have found all of you ^_^. Your love and understanding has added a new dimension to my life.

I wish all of you a verrry Happy New year. The new year will bring its own adventures and challenges. I hope that all of us grow as individuals, with a richer heart and beautiful experiences to share. Through it all, walk with me.

Have a great time!

God bless you

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Passing thought...

Making something out of nothing. That's human potential.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

A whole new world.....

Guess what?
My uncle gifted me a digital camera this week! I wanted one for so long but circumstances were such that it had to wait. I guess luck just kicks in at times.

More than myself or my friends, what I love clicking the most is the things around me. It may be a simple market full of busy people, but there is beauty there too.It's something special to just capture those people who move by without noticing each other. So what do I do? I stand far away. Simply stop for a moment and think about what exactly I see.

What I see is an enormous whole where each person is connected to another and simply incomplete without each other's presence. Even in a busy market, though we may never really pay attention to it, we feel safe when there are people around us. When the crowd begins to thin, it's time to go home. We are so deeply linked in a way and such complete strangers at the same time. Such is the world we live in.

So I chose this day to capture a few shots of our busy market where people from all parts of our city pour in to shop for anything and everything.

And I'll tell you something else. Sometimes, it's simply lovely to be alone and appreciate the world around you. And these sometimes are going to be pretty often 'coz I believe that there is something to capture everywhere we go.


Sunday, December 20, 2009


A moment out of time, a moment where you can leave all your thoughts behind and just enjoy the company of the ones you love.
That was what 19th of December stood for me. I realised that in any joint initiative what matters most is teamwork and bonding.

A Volunteer moment

Our Christmas Day Celebrations at Pehal (the NGO I work for) was a great success! Yes, it is the children we do all this for, but without the correct guidance and support, none of us would have lasted. None at all. We would just be disillusioned and drift away with time. But that is not possible in this case and why is that? Because of the way our team has come together. The credit for this goes to Prachi, our project co-ordinator. Not only is she a wonderful person with great initiave, but she also knows how to bring people together and make them feel like they belong. That is what she has done for me. Today I feel as though I BELONG to project Aashayein (Hope) and all its other projects and that is mainly because of Prachi's warmth, understanding and encouragement.

The event was a great success right from decorating the room to distributing snacks amongst the children to playing games with them! But the best part was played by SANTA! Our dear fellow volunteer who played the part perfectly!
All I can associate with Project Pehal is the sincere desire to make a difference and taking all the required steps in bridging the gap between what is and what needs to be.

Our dearest Santa at work!

Lastly, I want to thank our dearest Prachi, without whom Project Pehal and Aashayein would have simply hung in the air. Thank you for being with us and making everything special.

Dr. Prachi with her irresistible smile!

Monday, December 14, 2009

The love which pours out....

Tell me something,
Today I ask all of you a question. Perhaps I'm mistaken somewhere and I sincerely hope you will correct me if I am.
The thing is, whenever I make someone my friend, I have this need inside me which grows day by day and suddenly, it grows so much that it becomes a part of my being. I get this desire to know that person, not merely as an acquaintance but as someone who matters. I get this desire to touch the very depths of that person's heart and be an inseperable part of him/ her.

I am talking about friends here. Friendship goes way beyond the irregular hellos in my case. Friendship means a bond where two people can share anything under the sun, anything that troubles them and anything that makes them happy. Friendship means that you can cry on my shoulder when you are in pain and I can count on you when I am shattered. Friendship means that I will be there for you when you need me, even if it is at some unearthly hour. Friendship means I WILL MAKE TIME for you, I will let you know all my weaknesses and be happy that you know. It means that I give you the power to hurt me or love me, as you please. Friendship is synonymous with love for me. Love has so many forms and friendship is its very foundation.

Do I ask for too much?

Sometimes people ask me..

Why do you want to know that person so badly?
Why do you care so much?
Why can't you be happy with just talking to that person every now and then?
Why do you want to know every side of that person?
Why do you want to be a part of his/ her heart?

Why why why...why indeed?

The only answer I can give to that is that that's the only way I know. Love with everything I have or don't love at all. I don't get this feeling with everybody but when I get it for somebody, its hard for me to let go of things half way.

Is it soo bad to want to be a part of someone's heart? To be there and love that person with all that we are capable of? I don't mean love in the romantic sense. I mean love with all its colours and all its healing powers. The love which reaches out and protects the ones you care for.

Sadly, my love is misunderstood more often than being understood.

So tell me, do I ask for a lot?

Thursday, December 10, 2009


The silent night beckons me,
Reaches out and engulfs me in its splendour,
Making my heart ache with wonder and awe,
I ask myself, what lay behind this dreamy richness?
What mysteries does the night hold?
The silence taunts me,
Makes me realise what I've been missing out on,
So what do I do?
I reach out,
I give in,
I let go,
I let my heart take over my mind
I shun all logical thinking,
I let my feelings take over,
I give free reign to the emotions flowing through my body,
Filling my being and washing out everything else,
Oh, but what do I find?
I find a soul freed from all bonds,
I find a soul which dares to walk alone,
I find the soul which makes me what I am,
In the silent night, I find myself.

Monday, December 7, 2009


In the hush of the night, your thoughts haunted me.
I tried, tried so hard not to think of you,
To not feel more than I should,
But feelings, as they are, refused to see reason,
Making it all the more torturous,
It wasn't any consolation that you felt the same way,
It just added to the pain,
added to the pain of knowing, wanting and then denying,
But the road ahead isn't bleak,
For you are warm in my heart as I know I am in yours,
Don't despair,
For this is not the end,
If not now, then another lifetime,
Life will move on and so will you,
You will find a reason to love again,
For I am sure there is someone out there just waiting for you,
It hurts now, but it's the only path we can choose.

This post is dedicated to someone very special in my life. I am thankful to have known him and loved him as a dear one. Life is not always as uncomplicated as we think and sometimes the right path isn't the easiest one to walk on.

All I can say to you is...move on and have a lovely life. At the end of one journey starts a wonderful new journey. Wish you all the happiness in the journey of life.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Where are you pulling me?

It's getting stronger. Something's pulling me. Harder with every passing day and I can't make any sense of it.

My heart says.....
Can you see??
Do you see what I see??
Can you feel the yearning that is growing inside you?
Can you feel that you want to fly?
But I ask my heart...How do I fly?
I see the roads ahead and I know I want to be there, but how do I get there?

What's happening? Is the desire to be alone becoming stronger with every passing day? Don't know the answer to that.

But one thing is for sure...
I want to explore, I want to travel and now it's just a matter of time of how long I can curb these feelings.

My heart wants to fly, my mind wants to wander, my soul wants to explore. Everything is pulling me towards an unknown destination. My mind is in a fog as I'm sure you can make out from my writing.
Can anybody please tell me what is happening to me, coz I'm certainly making no progress!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


Give me a moment for I don't ask for more, to comprehend this world before me,
Sometimes I cower in fear and sometimes I revel in its beauty,
But what is my calling?
My heart is speaking a language different than that of my mind,
There is something nagging inside me,
Pulling me, demanding my attention,
But why do I see darkness everywhere?
The main question I dare?
Do I dare to follow my heart and stand all alone?
The world stands before me,
But I stand staring at it uncomprehendingly,
People move by, push me away,
There is a mad rush you know,
People have to earn a living,
But are they living??
I've grown up to see that money means everything and fame is what people desire,
Am I not normal to want love more than anything else?
Am I not normal for dreaming dreams that are too romantic in nature?
Give me a moment to comprehend where I live,
For what I see makes no sense to me.
But do I dare to stand alone?

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Dying and then jolting back with life..!!!!

For the past few days I could feel an air of gloom setting around me. I could feel myself stagnating. To tell you the truth, it's dance yet again! It's almost been 2 months since my last dance class. I really really miss it. Being away from dance makes me realize how much I need it to be in touch with myself. Dance is my identity and the more I stay away from it, the stronger it hits me.

So to make things better, I just locked the doors and decided to dance those blues away!!
Now I feel ten times better and a helluva lot more alive!
2 more weeks and I'm back to the dance floor!
My freedom awaits me and all I can say to myself at the moment is...BE PATIENT!!

Sunday, November 15, 2009


I live in a country where the poor people outnumber the rich ones, the urban class is oblivious to the turmoils of the rural class or perhaps prefer to stay in oblivion.
There are thousands of slums in our country with the majority of the children not going to schools. Not because the parents can't afford it but because there aren't enough people to make them UNDERSTAND.

I am a college going student involved in Social Work and a few days ago I actually entered a slum and saw from close quarters what was the living condition of the people who inhabited it. It wasn't a pleasant sight, to say the least. The sewage system was bad and you could see dirty water flowing everywhere, entering the tiny shacks when it rained too much. I looked into one of the houses and it was not more than 6x6 feet. I could see 7-8 people crammed inside. That is the condition they live in. No sewage system along with no hygiene in the area.
I wish I could put up some pictures to give you guys a better understanding of how it was. But I guess that will have to wait.

Along with that, we went to a construction site where migrant labourers lived with their children. Since they have to migrate every few months or years, they never get their children enrolled. That is where we are needed. To teach children who don't even know the meaning of education. But we had encountered a problem in that site. Majority of the labourers were Bengali and were hostile towards us. When one Hindi speaking labourer went on our behalf, they ouright refused, misunderstanding our offer. They thought we would charge them but fortunately, I'm a Bengali too!! After speaking to them and reassuring them that we would charge no money and would come to THEM, they agreed!

And hurray for that!!

We have launched 2 new projects. The project in the slum area has been named ABHILASHA which means WISH DESIRE. In this context it implies the desire to change the present condition of the children and help them in shaping a new tomorrow . The other project in the construction site (which I am really looking forward to) is named PEHAL, which means INITIATIVE in the Indian sense.

The fact is that there is a lot of work to be done and most of it will be hard. But the truth is that there is a solution for everything and I'm not saying this because I'm simply idealistic. We met a teacher who has been teaching the slum children for more than 10 years without any help from any NGO. It was he who told us that things can be difficult but if we have the right attitude and patience, things will happen.

So that is what we are working towards.....TO MAKE THINGS HAPPEN.

For anyone who is interested in reading what we do, please follow this link. It's the link to our first project named AASHAYEIN which means HOPE-

Monday, November 9, 2009


I walked on.....waiting...watching,
For the right time to come,
For the right person to come join me,
I waited..I walked,
The road became blurry,
The shadows haunted me,
Challenged me to go on,
I faltered..thought of giving up,
But something told me not to look back,
Don't give up..the silky voice whispered,
Not after coming such a long way,
So I squared my shoulders and walked on,
Morning came but with no hope,
The road ahead was bleak again,
No sign of life,
No sign of the one I waited for,
But I kept walking,
Never looking back, some unearthly hour,
When I had almost given up hope,
YOU stood before me,
You rewarded me for my perseverance,
You loved me for never giving up,
And I loved you back,
Because you made me realise,
That the hardest of journeys is not so hard when you know what you are looking for.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

This is what I think...

"In the sky of hope when the rays
start fading, don't look away. The clouds have just blocked their way, not
stopped them".

Today I want to ask all of you a question-

What is the thought which first comes to your mind when you think of me or my blog? What do you think before visiting my blog?

Something like..oh here comes another oh so philosophical and boring post?..hehe.

There are a few blogs which I regularly follow and I want to tell those people how much they mean to me and how much I love reading their blogs. So here goes-

1) Nancy- There is always a feeling of tremendous warmth whenever I think of you. Your blog gives me an insight into different facets of life and makes me believe that there is hope for everything. Thank you for ALWAYS being there. Your wisdom and honesty has always pulled me towards you.

2) Emmi- What can I say to you love? Whenever I think of you and your blog, the first word that comes to my mind is fighter. You're a fighter with tremendous courage and I love to read your blog. Everything about your blog is straight from the heart. You inspire me and always will.

3) John- Hehe..John. Whenever I think of your blog, the word open comes to my mind. You seem to be a very open hearted and kind person.Your blog invites everyone to join in and share the fun! I look forward to reading your blog because it simply documents the thoughts of a very good person with lovely thoughts.

4) Ron- Whenever there is a new entry in Ron's blog, I simply can't wait to read it! Every entry captures a new journey, a new experience and new emotions. You are a lovely writer Ron. All I can say to you is that you describe your life through a lens, and we are glad that we can share it with you. The only word that comes to my mind when I think of your blog is..amazing, simply amazing!

5) Gypsywoman- When I first stumbled upon your blog, I simply knew I had to follow you. There is something extremely beautiful and intriguing about your blog. Fearless is the word that comes to my mind when I think of your blog, for that is the impression I get from the way you write. Beautiful.
I want to thank all of you for making my blogging experience extremely beautiful and worthwhile.

Lots of love

Sunday, November 1, 2009


A moment when life strikes you with the force of a hurricane,
A moment you would want to freeze,
A moment in which your mind, body and soul are in perfect synchronisation,
A moment which won't come back again,
A moment where every pore of your being cries out with the joy of being alive,
A moment..that is all that it is,


That is what dance is for me...LIFE.

Friday, October 30, 2009


Lost in a myriad of doubts and questions, we didn't know what to expect or not to.That was the frame of mind we met in. No expectations. Just accepting what came our way.

I don't have enough words to describe how beautiful it was.

I'm so glad that things have worked out for us. It has actually more than worked out!Being in a long distance relationship is not easy but all I can say is that it isn't impossible either! Now that we have a reason to hold on to eachother, nothing can separate us! If he wouldn't have come to meet me this year, I don't think I would have the strength to hold on. So, first of all, I want to thank you for coming to me, my love.

If it weren't for him, I would never realise how much I was missing out in life. If not for him, I would never realise that inspite of the many things I do, the happiness I feel with him pales everything else in comparison. That's the truth...when I am with him, the world pales in comparison. He becomes the centre of my existence, my reason to live, my reason to achieve great things in life. Never have I felt as complete a human being as I do when I am with him.

When he was here, I asked myself a few questions-

What more can I ask when I have the man who loves me for what I am and NEVER judges me?
What more can I want when he loves me unconditionally and demands only love in return?
What more can I want when I know that he lives miles away from me and is faithful only to me?
What more can I want when all that he wants is to make me happy?
What more can I want when the man I love has more faith in me than I have in myself?

The answer is simple....I can ask for NOTHING more for I need nothing more.

Once again, this journey has shown me that nothing is impossible when we have the will to make things work. I shudder to think that I was ever thinking of letting go.

Now that he has gone, there is both happiness and sadness. Happiness because I know we will make it. the prospect of being without him for a long time again. Inspite of the happiness, there is a gaping hole in my life. A hole which only his love can fill.

All I can say to him is...

I will wait for you. I can close my eyes and trust you with everything I have. There is nothing I can hide from you. Everything I feel for you is there for you to see. I give you my heart for I know that you will take care of it at any cost. Even at the cost of you being hurt. I am here to prevent that. I love you with all I have and all I am capable of. Thank you for always having faith in us. Be mine for life. God bless you.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


Dear friends,

My baby is coming to visit me after almost a year and will be here for a week. I won't be active for a week from tomorrow as his train reaches here in the afternoon.

Every meeting is a challenge for us, every meeting holds many possibilities. Doubts are inevitable when your loved one lives so far away, but we haven't let go. It's been more than 2 years and we're still strong. I know the journey ahead won't be easy, but then again what is the meaning of a life without struggle? I don't know what tomorrow holds for us but what I do know is that the journey this far holds one of the most beautiful memories of my life.
Just wish us the best this time.
I leave you (for a very short while) with this parting thought-
Life without love is like dance without music. You
can move on without it, but it will have no


Lots of love

Sunday, October 18, 2009


Persepolis is an autobiographical graphic novel by MARJANE SATRAPI depicating her childhood in Iran during the Revolution. The title is after the historical town called Persepolis.

My friend gave me the book and said it was a great read and after reading the book, I have to say that I agree.

The whole revolution is seen through the eyes of the child who is suddenly forced to change the ways of her life. It is sad yet when we see it from the eyes of a child, all we can see is the bewilderment and frustration at not being allowed to live the way she wants to.

As the book progresses, one can see the different emotions which the child feels. Her strong desire to become a prophet changes completely in the background of the changing political scenario. In its place comes the desire to overthrow the evil shah who was turning their lives upside down. As time passes, the atrocities committed on the people becomes common knowledge. One particular scene was extremely tragic when Satrapi hears that there has been bombing in her area. She comes running home only to find out that her neighbour's building has been bombed. Just when she and her mother were contemplating whether or not their neighbours might be at home, satrapi sees the bracelet which her neighbour (Neda) wears. Before her mother could react, she went to pull that bracelet only to find a hand attached to it under all the ruins. Her scream exploded in my ears too. The fact is that we can only empathize to an extent. The horror that particular incident will always be written on HER mind.

The book is a marvellous description of the tragic events which shook the whole population of Iran. Because the book is through a child's eye, the enormity and significance of those events are both dulled and magnified at the same time.

An amazing book and a must read.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Faith, God and Free Will


Many times people have asked me-"Deboshree, do you believe in God?"
I reply-"No, I don't"
"But why??"

And this is how it goes-

I was a firm believer in God but then certain things happened which eroded my faith in Him. I know that everyone goes through trying times and sometimes when people lose faith, they get it back with time. I lost it and never got it back.

I have come to believe in the immense power of our minds and I believe that we are the makers of our own destiny. I don't believe that there is a God who paves the way for us and guides us. What I do believe in though is that there is something known as Universal Justice. What goes around inevitably comes around. I get what I give. If I sin, then I am sure to pay for it. I believe that everything in this Universe happens when it is exactly supposed to happen. Everything happens for a reason. I believe in Karma and most of all, in human will.

I believe that what matters the most is the kind of person you are. It is one thing to be remembered for your wealth and fame but it is something entirely different to be remembered and missed for all the love you gave. I want to be remembered for the latter reason.

Sometimes I used to think that we humans in general are weak and thus we believe in God..that undefinable somebody on whom we can fall back upon. I always felt that we need support and when we are lonely, He is the only one we can rely on. So is there a God for real or is He just a figment of our imagination?

But there is something else I know. The ones who have faith in Him are blessed. Blessed because they know that they are never alone. Wonder how that feels..knowing that you are never alone and there is someone watching over you. I don't have that. But to be honest, I don't feel a great sense of loss.

My grandfather has had a profound impact on me. He never believed in God and that affected me too. I came to look at the world through his eyes. I came to see that we can do whatever we want to. It's not God or Destiny which will lead us. It is we ourselves. There is no one else. Now that he is gone, I realise that his vision is the vision I WANT to have.

I guess I am simply agnostic in nature. My dear friends, I know that most of you believe in God and if anything I said is offensive to you, I apologize beforehand.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

My tribute to a great man

They were a happy family, living well with all they wanted and more. But something changed. The four children lost their mother and their lives turned upside down. Their grandparents came to live with them, bringing along with themselves a whole new set of rules and regulations to be followed by the spoiled children. But then again, they had no idea what was coming.

He came into their lives with the force of a hurricane and with equal force made them change their ways. Pampered children who never knew how NOT to get what they wanted were now facing a whole new world. A world where things were not as rosy as before, a world where one had to THINK before acting instead of acting mindlessly. Was it easy for them? NO. Was it easy for him to be firm with them? NO. But he did it and the children began to change. They learned to see that life is not all about getting what you want but is actually about giving what you can. They understood that self control, discipline and the value of one's words were of utmost importance. It was imprinted in their minds that nothing can be more important than one's principles in life and breaking them is actually insulting yourself and what you stand for. Was it tough for the kids? Yes, very much so. But was it worth it? Yes, definitely yes. It may have been the hard way but in this case it was the best way. The anger would seem nothing in the long run when they would realise how much their grandfather had actually done for them.

Today, I want to thank my grandfather for all he has done for us. Because of him, I am what I am. If I am a strong human being today who understands the value of self respect, discipline and hard work, it is all because of him. He had a will of iron and he has shown us how to live fearlessly. That is how I remember him, a man who lived on his own terms, a man who lived fearlessly. I was young when I lost Mom and after she went away, I developed a kind of phobia. I started think that any health problem I had was an indication of cancer. It was then when I told him about it that he told me...a coward dies a thousand times before his death a valiant dies but once. At that moment I knew what I wanted to be and I have never looked back since then. There are so many things which he taught all of us and I know that without him our character would not have the strength it has now.

He passed away in front of my eyes this Tuesday, but I am not sad. I am happy, happy to see him relieved of the pain he was going through. I am happy because I know that the very moment he passed away, he has started a new life in some corner of this world. He has not left us, he never will. I still feel his presence all around for I know that he will always be watching. I love you Dadu, always have and always will. I won't say goodbye to you. All I can wish is for you to have a happy life.

Saturday, October 3, 2009


You know how it is sometimes.....

A friend recommends a book very highly and you feel you already know that the book isn't so good but since your friend likes it soooo much, you decide that you must give it a try atleast. Something like that happened to me........

Twilight, by Stephanie Meyer, has been considered as a book for teenagers and so I ASSUMED that it won't be my type. But then two of my friends had gone crazy about it. So I started to think..what the hell can be so special about a love story between a human and a vampire. But I had a bit of free time, so why not read it and find out myself and this is what I found......

There is no end to how beautiful and profound love can be, there are no limits, the only limits are the ones we set ourselves, there is no end to how much we can love somebody and to what lengths we can go to protect them and the Twilight Saga has just shown me all this and much more.

Our imagination, left unexplored for too long starts to rot and dies a silent death, but what about the people who dare to imagine, who dare to explore the inner recesses of their minds, what about them? They are the ones who experience the joy of their minds,the joy of being free, they are the ones who produce brilliant works while the rest of us can only sit and admire. But do you know what the truth is? All of us have it in us. We either don't pay attention to it or simply don't have time.
Twilight is a love story between a Vampire (Edward Cullen) and a normal human being (Isabella Swan). The author has captured the pain, the agony and the beauty of such love. How can a vampire fall in love with a human and not end up killing it? Especially when her blood is exactly the type of blood he has always thirsted for? This is why...

First of all, the Cullen family is different than normal vampires. They choose to live like humans rather than monsters guided by their instincts. They live on animal blood although they have learned self control after centuries of practice and determined efforts. They did kill humans at one point of time, but that changed once they became a part of Carlisle Cullen's family. Carlisle was the head of the family and an amazing doctor to fellow human beings. He was the lone person who chose this way of life. His self control was such that the sight and smell of human blood could not tempt him in the least. He had a choice and he chose to protect humans rather than thinking of them as his food. He was the one who added the rest of the members to the Cullen family, actually he was the one who MADE them. Keep this in mind that he never changed a human being into a vampire if he had the choice. He led a lonely life for centuries and was plagued by loneliness. Could he change someone into a vampire? How would he do it? Was it the right thing to do? He himself was bitten by a vampire and the pain was excruciating, did he have the heart to put someone through the same pain again and what if that person didn't survive? But all these questions were answered in one go when in 1918, Edward (17 years old) was dying of the Spanish Influenza. His father had died and his mother implored Carlisle ,in her death bed ,to save Edward at any cost and he did what he had to. And thus came Edward, the vampire, frozen at the age of 17 years for eternity

Isabella Swan, 17 years of age wanted to leave Arizona to give her mother and his new husband some time alone. So she decided to do the noble thing and that was to simply get away. Even if it meant going to the place she hated the most...Forks ,where her Dad lived, where there was incessant rain, where the sun would rarely make an appearance from behind the dark clouds. That's Isabella Swan for you, the one ready to sacrifice her happiness for the ones she loved.

Little did she know what fate was awaiting her in the small town of Forks. Little did she know that she would fall in love with the boy she met in her school, the boy who always stared at her and kept his distance from her. Little did she know how much pain she was causing Edward.
Edward, torn between his thirst and his love for her, was always fighting. A battle which required tremendous self control and determination on his part. But he did it and so did his family.

The love story between them is a dream come true for every romantic. But it isn't always rosy. There has to be some villain, someone who would want to burst their bubble of happiness and guess who can it be? Vampires ofcourse, vampires who come across the Cullen family and are stunned to find a human among them. And then begins the hunt, the hunt for Bella's blood.

This is what happens in the first book. Although she is relatively safe by end of this book, there are many more threats just waiting for her. The Twilight Saga, ie, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn are works of a great mind and lovely imagination.
I am sure that at least few of you must have watched the movie. Most of the times, movies don't do justice to the books but believe me, this movie has done a fantastic job. I loved the movie. It was shot beautifully although Bella's (Kristen Stewart) acting needs a bit of work. No one could have fit the role of Edward as beautifully as Robert Pattinson did. He was literally Edward come true. The chemistry between Edward and Bella has done justice to the book. I am anxiously awaiting New Moon's release for I know it will be amazing too.

The Twilight Saga is a journey, a journey which shows what love is and what it can make one do. Love is not just happiness, but a multi faceted emotion which requires tremendous courage and faith.

For the first time I read a book which went beyond the love affair. The author actually takes us on a journey where not many authors can take us, ie, the journey of what happens AFTER the love affair.

I would like to thank Stephanie Meyer for producing such a great work which speaks volumes about her creativity and imagination. This is the type of work which can be produced when one lets their imagination take the front seat and reason the back seat. Hats off to her.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Away too long...

Hello my dear friends..!!
I've been away too long!
Actually, I've been dying to write a piece on my trip to Rajasthan. The tragedy was that my camera didn't work and I've had to wait for my friends to link me the pictures.

So here goes...

First of all, the trip was lovely. Rajasthan is a lovely place and I'm glad I went. I came to realise that it is rather stupid of me to always want to go to foreign countries when I haven't seen my own country properly! There is sooo much to see, so much beauty to appreciate. We basically went to Udaipur and Mount Abu. 2 days in Udaipur and 1 day in Mount Abu.

The place I was most impressed with in Udaipur was the CITY PALACE built by Maharana Udai Singh.

I was simply lost in its splendour and beauty. The way the kings used to live, the luxury, the beauty and the grandeur with which they celebrated everything simply blew me away. The views were so breathtaking that my friends had to actually drag me away. I have never travelled much and I know I would simply love to. I tried to make the most of every single moment and I guess that is one of the reasons why I loved these places so much.

Apart from many other tourist attractions, one which will always be imprinted in my memory is the Sunset Point in Mount Abu. I was amazed by the number of people who came to see it. Most of them were locals and it was lovely to see how nature pulled all of us together. It was as if all of us were joined together with something common and the moment the sun set, there were people hooting from every direction! Cries of joy could be heard everywhere and it was hard for us NOT to join in. So what the heck..!! We hooted too!

All in all, it was a wonderful trip and I will always carry the memories in my heart.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Wish me a happy journey

Hello there dear friends,
I'll be off for my college trip today at around 5:00 pm. We are going to MOUNT ABU and UDAIPUR in Rajasthan. I'll be back on 23rd at around 6:00 am.
I'll see you guys then and tell you all about my trip.

Love to all
See you soon

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Time for the leap...

Before I start this post, I would like to thank all those who understood me and actually made me see a different perspective of things. By the way, my grandfather came back that very evening. It was nothing serious, just a stomach infection, for which I am thankful.


Time is passing by and soon I will be finishing my college. Just a few more months and then comes the great leap. Once again starts the mad race of getting in in some good institute along with getting the course you wanted in the first place..hehe..that's rather difficult but not impossible. I mainly want to do my post graduation in International Relations but along with that I will also apply for Development Studies and Counselling. Somehow I know I will be great in Counselling. So let's see what it shall be. Time is passing by and so are the precious moments in college with my friends. After this final year no one knows where they will land up, so suddenly it seems that we friends have hardly spend any quality time together. It's as if there is no end to such leaps in life. From school to college, from college to university, from university to job, from job to marriage and so on..the cycle never ends right? But I guess that is how we evolve as human beings. Otherwise we would stagnate right?

Here is a picture of my college and I think it is positively beautiful. It's worth seeing when all the flowers are in full bloom.

I will miss my college like anything! It has given me so much. My college has been the healing experience I desperately needed. It has given me the confidence and faith which was eroded, the friends who have loved me and understood me against all odds, the opporunities which have made me what I am today and much more.
I will miss these college days....when all we have to worry about is grades and pocket money..hehe..I know that soon life will be much more complicated and will demand a lot more from me. But what the heck? That's life right? And I'm loving every moment of it.
So three cheers for IP college for Women..proud to be a part of it!

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Now is this selfish or is this selfish?

Has anyone ever felt that love makes one selfish? Instead of all the lovely words associated with love I would like to use this word for once.

How does love make one selfish? When we love somebody, we want that person to spend as much time as possible with us. Why? Because it makes US happy, because WE want that person, WE need that person. Obviously its a two way thing with giving and receiving but in a way I find it selfish. Now you must be thinking why suddenly I'm thinking of love this way..well there is a verrrryy strong reason.

You know what I did...Yesterday my grandfather was taken to the hospital at around 4:30pm and I had my dance class at around 6:00 for which I would have to leave at 5:30. Instead of staying at home, I went for my dance class. There was no one except my brother, grandmother, her nurse and our domestic helper at home. My sisters were both out, working.
The right thing to do would be to stay at home, but I didn't. My love for dance pulled me and I couldn't resist. Didn't want to resist. Now how about that? Was that selfish or was that selfish? That was selfish. I never like to think of myself as a selfish human being, for I never want to be . But didn't my love for dance just make me one?

The feeling isn't very pleasant to say the least. I feel rotten but there is no point in feeling that now, right? As they say, what's done is done, but that doesn't solve my problem. I never want my love for someone or something make me selfish. Actually, I want quite the opposite. But is that possible? Is there actually no selfishness involved in love or do we just choose to see it that way?

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Small things that make me happy

This post is a reply to my dear Emmi.
Let's see..I simply have to write the small things of life which make me happy. I would like all of you reading this post to do the same.

So here goes-

1) Watching good anime especially Kenshin and Bleach.
2) Singing along whenever I listen to a song I love.
3) Dancing!! The moment I listen to Deja Vu by Beyonce or Buttons by PCD, I
seem to lose control..hehe..these aren't my favourite songs yet I love the
beats for dancing.
4) Just closing my eyes and listening to soft numbers like All out of love and
making love out of nothing at all by Air Supply or Right here waiting by
Richard Marx.
5) Buying trinkets like earings when I have hardly any money
left..hehe..somehow I feel happy when I do buy such things. Even nail paint!
6) Just looking at my partner's picture where he is smiling is enough to make
me smile back. Sometimes just looking at him in the webcam and watching
him look back at me is enough silence me and thank god for what I have
7) Eating chips!!! Lays especially!
Let's include chicken momos to that list also! And a South Indian dish called
Vada Saambar.It's pure heaven!
8) Irritating the hell out of my best friend Neha makes me happy..hehe..her
reactions are all worth it!
9) Writing a piece on my blog knowing that there are people out there who
care to drop by and read my random thoughts.
10) Reading a novel which keeps me hooked all through the day and leaves me
in a daze all night long makes me feel great! Makes me realise how much I
11) Dressing up before going to college..not to impress others but for my own
satisfaction makes me feel good.
12) Getting things done gives me a high. The feeling of accomplishment is
worth all the effort.
13) SLEEPING! I love sleeping, especially when I am dead tired and deserve it!

Now, now...I can go on and on. Such a post gives a real insight into the type of person one is. Even though it is based on the small things of life, it somehow reflects what one really loves in life.
Your turn my friends...

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Who is lost and who isn't?

Walking through the roads, I see all kinds of expressions on people's faces. Some kind, some haggard, some angry, some tired and some plain lechy. But there is something common in most of their expressions. There is a dullness which comes of living a mundane life with nothing to look forward to. How must that feel?

The common man who earns is too worried about money and the future of his children. The mother, if working, is torn apart between duty and profession which gives her no time for herself. I sometimes feel that people stop making an effort to evolve after a certain level. Perhaps it is an unconscious thing and they don't even realise it as they are too caught up in day to day activities. Another fact is that not everybody can have the luxury to "GET AWAY". Not everybody can afford it and what happens to them? I wonder...

What happens when one stops asking questions to oneself? Stops questioning their own actions and why did they happen the way they did. Sometimes the competition around sickens me. It is everywhere and it makes one selfish. It makes one feel that the whole world is standing against them and there is nothing to do but fend for themselves. Sometimes I just feel like walking away from all this and being totally alone with just a pen and paper. Nature attracts me a lot at such times and I truly regret that I have never seen much of it.

Hehehe... I'm being too serious eh? Just felt it and needed to write it. As always that is what gives me solace when my mind is troubled.

In the journey of life I want to make sure that I don't stop evolving as a human being . If I stop that, my life will be empty, devoid of any meaning. When I stop evolving, I will have nothing to offer and nothing worth receiving in return. Let's all make sure that such a stage never comes. That is why I always make sure that at least one day in a week is just for me, for how can I give to others if I don't give anything to myself?

So three cheers to me time!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Our very first dance class

So people, I'm finally a dance trainer. Not in the sense you are thinking. I DID NOT take up probation and give up all my hours to dancing in front of the mirror at the cost of sacrificing everything else. But I have still become a trainer. How?
Yes, I taught dance to the children, children who are too poor to afford Jazz classes. These are the children who belong to the NGO I work for. It was great. The feeling was great, knowing that I can make good use of my talent and not just for myself but for spreading happiness among these children. Dance brings confidence and increases one self esteem along with building determination. At least dance has done that to me and much more along with that.
The children were a bit difficult to handle but on the whole, they were eager learners who respected my love for dance and did what I told them to do. It was a two way thing, you know. It wasn't as if they were the only ones benefiting from my classes. They helped me too. It was heart warming to see that they loved me and respected me enough to listen to me and give their 100%. And when they dance! Wow! They picked up really fast. I knew they were talented, but sooo much! I'm very proud of them and I know that every saturday will be a new learning experience, both for them and me.
This Saturday hit home the fact once again- THERE IS NOTHING GREATER THAN THE JOY OF GIVING.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Dirty dance...anyone?

Wow.. I finally watched the movie!

The movie was made in 1987 with Patrick Swayze (Johnny) and Jennifer Grey (Baby) as the lead actors.

From the time I was a child I was crazy about the movie and unfortunately always saw it in bits and pieces. I think Patrick Swayze is extremely sexy. I wish I could dance with him...hehe..keep dreaming Deboshree.

The chemistry between Johnny and Baby was lovely to say the least. It was amazing. I really believe that dancing brings out the best in us. I never feel as alive as I do while dancing. Freedom is the word. I feel like I'm flying and no one can take that away from me. That is one reason I can never stop dancing.

The choreograpy by Kenny Ortega was simply mind blowing. Till date, Dirty Dancing is one of the best dance movies I have seen.

If given a chance, I would love to learn dirty dancing although it is more of instinct in this dance form rather than technique (at least that is the impression I got).

The music, my god, is wonderful! Cry to me, time of my life, hungry eyes and she's like the wind are all amazing. The movie was such a wonderful package with great music, amazing choreography and lovely acting.

I wonder if anyone else feels like dancing that way (can you hear me Emmi?). I certainly do and at least once, I will.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

The day that was.......

Have I ever in my life had such a wonderful Independence day in my life? I think not!

Yesterday on 15th August, I was to spend the day with the children of the NGO I work for. Aashayein (Hopes) is the name of our NGO which is under AID(Association for Indian Development).

All I can say is that the day was made special because of all the volunteers and the children. The camaraderie between all the volunteers was indeed heart warming. Because of the bonding things were easy to handle. The day had started with pouring rain but that didn't make a huge difference as the desire to have a wonderful day was too strong in us.

We had many activities which included a quiz competition, art competition, singing, dancing by the children which was followed by prize distribution and distribution of food packets.

More than anything else, the feeling of being one with all the volunteers is what touched all of us. After the end of the celebrations, all of us headed to Nirula's where we shared the laughter of a lifetime. We were in Nirula's in the above picture and I'm second on the right side.

I hope that yesterday was just the beginning of a wonderful journey. For me, it shall always be a day worth remembering.

Love to all my team members

Thursday, August 13, 2009


Well, I think everyone must have heard of this Academy award winning movie starring Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett.

I had heard quite a lot about this movie and we decided to rent the CD after we heard that Revolutionary Road wasn't available at the moment.

The movie was all I had expected and more. I don't know how to do justice with what I felt when I saw it last night. This movie made me wonder....what if...what if we were born the other way around? What if we became younger with every passing day? What if we kept growing younger? I think it would be terribly sad to see the ones you love fade away in front of your eyes while you keep getting younger. And terribly sad it was.

The movie made me think about so many things. Right now, at this moment, I'm young and alive. What will my life be like 20 years down the line? What will I be? Who will be with me and who will I lose? The moments pass by now without much notice but a time will come when every moment will drag and how longingly I will think of moments like these.

We come to this world all alone and leave it that way. But there is a short period between these two happenings and that is the time when we write our story. I know the coming years are going to bring the peak of my story and I want it to be beautiful. I want it to be something worth remembering, something that will give inspiration to people even after I leave this world. I don't want my life to be smooth sailing all the time. I want to see all sides of life and struggling is a very important part. How will I be strong if I don't struggle? I have seen quite a few things in life but not that much.

The movie made me feel grateful for what I have and grateful I am. It made me feel that the moment is now. There is no yesterday or tomorrow. What matters is now, today, this moment. It made me want to live every moment to the fullest for what I have today may not be with me tomorrow. The unpredictability of life struck me anew.

It made me feel that I have to make a difference and somehow, I just know I will.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Sorry Plato..I can't say I agree

So here I am......
3rd year of college and we have to study Western Political Thought where Plato features first. Our Greek philosopher's contributions to Political Science have been irreplacable. When I read his theories, I was amazed. How could a man possibly think so thoroughly? About every detail and every possible argument against it? No doubt Plato is a philosophical genius and he rightly deserves the place he has.
So far, I have gone through his Theory of Justice and Education. I can't say that I agree with all his points but I admire his thinking. I admire his thought process but not exactly his thoughts.
Somehow I feel that his Ideal State was harsh in nature. For him the Ideal State would be where each man did what he was best at doing. I believe in that but believing that every human can be compartmentalised as Philosopher Kings(Rulers), Warriors and the producing class with only wisdom, courage and temperance respectively dominating their minds is going a bit too far. Believing that only a philosopher king has the right to decide what the classes under him would do is rather unjust and unfair. To expect that the Rulers would only think of gaining knowledge, the warriors of dignity and honor and the producing class only of appetite is certainly erroneous. Man is a complete being with many sides and wanting only one part to dominate all the others stunts human growth and intelligence. It leads to a one sided development of the mind and body at the cost of other needs. A warrior may also desire knowledge and so may the producing class for that matter. What right does the State have to deprive man of his desires?
But more than any other theory, his theory of Communism of Wives revolted me. How could such a great thinker go to such an extent for excellence that he deprives children of a normal childhood? To say that human beings have some needs and the philosopher kings could freely go to any woman and the child produced should be given over to the State because nothing should hinder the king from gaining more knowledge, is rather cold and repulsive. I blurted out in class that it was disgusting in the middle of the lecture..hehe. Don't you think it is? In the quest for knowledge for the Philosopher Kings, Plato goes to the extreme.
But there are other theories which I have yet to study and I am looking forward to it. I agree to some of his theories and he is a genius in terms of philosophical thinking and social morality. But there are many aspects of these theories to which I simply can't agree.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009


What is beauty? Something which appeals the eye? Something beautiful and attractive? So what all comes under the purview of beauty?

For me beauty has many faces..let me tell you what I think is beauty-

Beauty is when we see a young child helping his grandfather cross the street,beauty is when someone succeeds in making another human being smile, beauty is the expression on one's face after reading a lovely book which had a profound impact on him/her, beauty is when you see someone walk with life poring out of every inch of the person's being, beauty is when you can see a person who has a true zest for living, beauty is when our mind and body move as one in the way we exactly we want, beauty is between two lovers walking hand in hand with not a care in the world. The connection and understanding which needs no words is what I would call beautiful.

Nature is beauty. The perfect sychronization between each and every living and non living thing, the way things are exactly where they are supposed to be, the silent understanding between animals is what I would call beauty.

Art is beauty, music is beauty, dance is beauty. For me anything which expresses the inner being is beautiful. What do you feel when you look at Michelangelo's work? Does it touch you? It certainly touches me and that is what is beautiful. The power to touch and to move. What do you feel when you listen to your favourite song? When I listen to Annie's Song by John Denver, I'm moved to tears. That is what I call beautiful. What do you feel when you see two dancers locked in each other's arms and giving all they have? What do you feel when you see their bodies moving in perfect unison and not a step seems out of place? Their movements seem effortless and for me, that is beautiful.

Beauty is expression and expression is beauty. So if we just look around, there is quite a lot of beauty to admire! Beauty isn't a complex phenomenon. It is there around us all the time. It's presence is everywhere if we care to look.